Page 16 - Discover WINTER 2022
P. 16
What's Your
SIGN?
By Charles Alexander
I’m not a big fan of signs. While some vehicle has a baby in it, so that you exercise
do serve a useful purpose, many serve only appropriate caution.
to call attention to the obvious. One of my
What is the appropriate caution to
favorites is SLIPPERY WHEN WET.
observe with respect to such a vehicle? Don’t
Really, aren’t most things? I mean, it’s not
ram into it? Don’t run it off the road? Don’t
true for socks, but water slides, bath tubs,
sideswipe it? Should I feel cheated if I fail
and tile floors have taught us this, no?
to endanger that vehicle and its occupants,
Some signs are useless for different only to learn later that there was no baby on
reasons. EMPLOYEES ONLY comes board, and they just forgot to take down the
to mind. Some may heed it, but for sign?
many, it seems to be perceived as a dare.
Nothing says “What on Earth
The same may be said for NO PUBLIC
Possessed You to Spend Money and Time
RESTROOM, PLEASE TAKE ONLY
Putting That Ridiculous Sign on Your Car?”
ONE, and 12 ITEMS OR LESS.
quite like CAUTION: SHOW DOGS. I
Then we have signs that are confusing don’t get it. Should I fear these animals? Is
as to their purpose. We see these in the there inherent danger in not being aware
windows of vehicles quite often. BABY that A) they are show dogs and B) they are
ON BOARD. What is the purpose of this present in this particular vehicle? Are the
sign? Is it to announce to the world that dogs driving? Is that one of their talents? Is
one is fertile? Do infertile people find this this yet another safety warning? Thanks for
insulting? I’m sure that some helpful person the tip.
might suggest that it is a safety warning.
A close relative of these signs is
Sorry, I’m still confused. Does this baby
the bumper sticker. One of the most
pose a threat to me and my vehicle? No,
counterproductive of these is the one that
they may say, it’s to make you aware that the
says, in small print, IF YOU CAN READ
14 Discover Smith Mountain Lake WINTER 2021
